Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Ecclesiastes 3:11

Good afternoon!

Ecclesiastes 3:11: He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end.

My mind is always wandering, always planning, always trying to figure things out. My life right now feels as if it is in a holding pattern. I am in a place that is not neccesarily bad but also not a place I want to be forever. What I dream of doing and becoming is not economically or financially possible right now. I am in a holding pattern. Destined for greater things for His glory but stuck in the issues of every day life.

But I believe it is temporary. Why? Because knowing what I was about to face before I ever got to this holding pattern, I stepped out in faith and reached out to God. I prayed and had the elders of my church pray over my husband and I. And God met us there and gave us instructions. He is very cool to do that, especially with my wandering and always planning brain! "This will test us and our marriage," he spoke through His messenger. "But this is temporary and we will see what kind of family we are when this is done."

I would rather not be here. I would love it if it were financially possible for me not to work and to raise my kids at home. I would love the extra time to volunteer and work in ministries. I want my hour of just "me and God" time that I used to have. With the stress of working full time, taking care of my almost 2 year old triplets, finding time to spend with my husband, connecting with friends and fellowshipping, paying bills, grocery shopping, and cleaning the house, my "me and God" time has decreased to the 30 minutes I get driving to work!

But reading this verse puts my heart at rest knowing that He has ordained this time in my life for a reason and He will make it beautiful despite how I feel about it now. I know that one day I will look back on this time in my life and be able to see growth and mercy and provision and miracles! There is no way I can fathom why it has to be this way but I will not wallow in defeat or despair, wishing things were different. God knows my beginning all the way to my end. He knows my children's beginning, their end and all those who will be touched by their testamonies. God is using this time to change us in ways we cannot begin to fathom. I pray we pass the test and come out fresh and renewed on the other side. I pray we come out beautiful!

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